When I Smile

from the book Poison Pen written in Worcester House of Correction 1982—83

Warm water. Pumping blood. Dream dust homing in, stick a pin to my eyes. Ahh, I can see no
longer, riding a sweet monkey — when I smile I’m a liar.

The Land of Nod, my castle keep. Sailing through the mist on my Chinese Junk, they speak of
rough seas, surely they jest. Calm seas, calm seas, the Dragon is floating. All is well, I am

This train is bound for glory. Riding hard on the rails, we’ve got the best tracks around. Sweet
loco-motive. Dragon powered, dusty rocket fuel. The Head Engineer reaches for steerage, he
can balance his pupils on the top of a pin. I shoot down the tracks, no free rides. I am smiling.

All flows smoothly, high powered, good connections. High tension wire walking, searching for
the red flag, dust storms, dust warms. Balancing on the head of a pin, all is peace, all is well,
can’t you tell. I am smiling.

Target practice. Micro fine arrows, shooting high, dust in my eyes. Trying to see the point of it
all. Anti-life, anti matter, does it matter? Balancing life on the head of a pin. When I smile I’m
a liar. I’ve got some good news to tell you, I can’t stop smiling